How to identify and avoid second-hand stress from others?

Hi friends,

Second-hand stress happens subconsciously in our daily lives. It can easily influence by other stressed people just like you having a common cold. In this post, you will learn how to spot second-hand stress and avoid the unnecessary stress.

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But we can learn how to identify second-hand stress and not sink into it. 

Identify 1: Identify the negative people in your life

It’s usually emitted by those people closest to you, in terms of relationships and time spent together. Thus, it tends to be your spouse/partner, children, work colleagues and supervisors and anyone else you spend a lot of time with, such as close friends or even neighbours. The more empathetic a person is, the more likely they will suffer second-hand stress.

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Identify 2: Recognize the situations in which second-hand stress can occur.

There are lots of times when you can unconsciously take on board another’s stress. Example:

A colleague, boss or client pressures you about a deadline that he or she perceives as urgent. You don’t believe it to be as urgent as this person insists but by the time you’ve heard his or her stress about it, you’ve joined the club.

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After identifying the second-hand stress, we need to know how to avoid it. The following are the solutions that may help you to release unnecessary stress.

Solution 1: Take charge of your own emotions

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Once you can recognize the times in your life when stress seems to be catching, you can begin to stop yourself from falling victim to absorbing other people’s stress.

Notice yourself mimicking stressful stances, attitudes and body language. Are you scrunching up your shoulders just like the stressful colleague? Are you screwing up your forehead with worry just like your spouse? Take a moment to notice how tense your body is and make a conscious choice to relax every part of it and shake off those negative vibes.
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Solution 2: Be an atmosphere change

  • If it’s someone complaining about things, tell them something positive about themselves or the situation.
  • If they’re worried about meeting a deadline, suggest spending time together to plot out a way to reassure the worrier. You could offer to show this person how you prioritize pressing tasks.
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Solution 3: Acknowledge and accept what you can’t change

  • You won’t always be able to put a positive shine on a situation or personal issue and you won’t always be able/want to be out of the presence of a stressful person or situation. In this case, you’ll need to armor yourself mentally and be prepared to remain positive and to not allow the stressful person’s outlook to color yours.
  • Stop trying to protect and comfort someone who is a source of stress when this increases your own stress. Sometimes you’ll need to call it like it is, as it’s quite possible the person bringing the stress home from work or spreading it around work, doesn’t even realize the impact that he or she is having on others. Tell the person in question about the impact his or her stress is having on you. Use “I” statements but don’t avoid it; the other person needs to understand how harmful this has become to you.

Prioritize your tasks and get it rolling ~ Have a great weekend ahead.

Do you want to know more about how NLP can transform your life and others around you? CLICK on this link – Free NLP Workshop.

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Jenniser
Programme Manager,

Mind Kinesis Management International & Mind Kinesis Investments Pte Ltd

Reference: http://www.wikihow.com/Spot-and-Avoid-Secondhand-Stress